Because my painkillers are kicking in.
Anything could happen.
I am very tired of this toe thing and these crutches. Like I keep thinking I am going to wake up and not need them and that my toe will be healed up and back to normal again. I keep having to remind myself that it’s broken, it isn’t a little scrape or something. It makes me feel needy.
Yesterday started out with little dramas, but it turned out pretty awesome and that awesome carried over to today.
So – it was early o’clock, and the kidlet is getting ready for school and I send him out to the bus. Its about 7:15, and I am standing at the window, two feet away while he stands outside the front door. No bus. No bus. No bus. At a quarter of, I call the bus garage and after they put me on hold a while, they tell me that the bus had been here at 7:18 am.This starts a flurry of ..stuff.Because I don’t really believe they were here at 7:18 – he was already outside waiting for them, but in the end it doesn’t matter if I am right or if they are right or if my clock was off.
I had been waiting to take the painkiller – to put it off as long as I could, and intending on taking it and maybe taking a nap or something.
Thats what the meds and my toe want me to do.
They want me to nap.
They want me to take a nap right now, they don’t care what I am doing, or that I am in the middle of a story. We’ll just have to be defiant and keep chatting. So – Nyah, to you toe and meds. Nyah.
Well. So I start trying to contact anyone I know who might not be at work yet. Because – I don’t drive, I think we established this.
Nor do I think I could drive if I did drive, because Toe.
So Toe and I start thinking we are really pathetic and we are really nervous that we wont be able to get the kidlet to school because that day, of all days, the power company was working on infrastructure and were going to be shutting our street off so they could do some kind of work on the lines. This complicated things because for several hours I would have nothing to do other than read and lay around. I would have to eat my lunch for breakfast before 8am. I would have to make sure I got another cup of coffee made. This would have been okay, this would have been just fine and only slightly horrible – but the thing is, the kidlet missed the bus.
He doesn’t want to read and he doesn’t want to eat lunch before 8am. He wants to stand in front of the fridge with the door open and he wants to play video games or record himself on his computer. He needs and wants to be at school, not laying around in the dark all day in a house with no snacks and no power, with his mom and Mom’s Toe issues.
Oh god. My Toe has a name now and its Toe, and I’ve just started speaking as if it were a separate entity from me.
Can I just blame my painkillers? Can I blame EVERYTHING on them?
You will let it slide right?
Okay, so a friend of mine comes through – she comes down and helps me get the kidlet to school just as his class was going to lunch, and then she makes sure I am fed, medicated and waggles her finger at me for not keeping Toe elevated properly and resting. While this finger waggling is going on – my best friend knocks on my door and gives me Chocolate covered fruits. Because she loves me – and because I am pathetic.
(Did I mention that once kidlet missed the bus – I never got that coffee made and I never managed to eat my lunch for breakfast before the power got turned off?)
I am also someone who has not seen anyone other than Kidlet and Husband and E.R. Staff for weeks, so suddenly being medicated and with finger waggling but sympathetic friends around me bearing gifts was not only surreal,but later made me cry.
You will be relieved – it was not ugly weeping.
I just have a tendency to cry when people are nice to me.
I waited until after they left, they finger waggled when it looked like I’d start sniffling.
Then today – another friend stopped by, bearing coffee and chocolate babka.
It will probably be too long before I see the three of these wonderful ladies again, It is unfortunate but it happens – we just have these long gaps between visits and finger waggling. But their gestures of love and kindness are better medicine than these painkillers any day.
If you need me, Toe and I will be sitting here in a stupor.